You're in high school again

Lunchtime at work has a way of making me feel like a loser in ways I've not felt in years. Normally all is good, I go down with a friend of mine and sometimes we join other people from our company that we run into. But then there's the days when she is gone, or doesn't eat in the cafeteria, and then I have to hope that I'll find people I know and catch them before they've eaten too much of their lunch. Sometimes I go with people from my department just to save myself the worry, even though they eat too early for my comfort. But a lot of the time, like today, I just take a gamble that I'll find a good group to sit with. Today, I thought I was safe. As I got my food, I ran into a few other people from my company who were together, people I like. I thought, cool, I can join them. I even gave what I hoped were some nice little eager-but-not-too-eager, mind-if-I-eat-with-you smiles as I passed these people in the food-getting area. They all got their food before me, and then I went out to the tables to find where they'd sat. After a bit of searching, I finally found where they were. And they were at a table that had no more spots to sit at. All sitting there smiling at and chatting with each other. I wandered through the tables some more, but I didn't see anyone else I knew. I felt so left out and unwanted, and I slunk over to a seat near the window that was at least in the sun so I could drown my gloom. I think tomorrow I'll be taking the safe route of eating with my department....